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President's message, October, 2019

posted Oct 30, 2019, 9:59 AM by Gary Urbatis   [ updated Oct 30, 2019, 10:00 AM ]

Mike’s Message for October


Last night I had a strange dream about CAC. I was watching mixed up classic TV shows, when I heard a knock at the door. I said, “Who’s there?”  They replied, “It’s the CAC. Come on out and join us for some fun.”  I thought, “Oh boy! Just what I need!”  I grabbed my coat and darted out the door. I was shocked to see that it wasn’t CAC at all. It was a land shark! I dove back inside just in time, and I managed to muscle the door shut. “Whew! That was close.”  I went back to the TV to watch Leave it to Gilligan.  A little while on, there was another knock.  “Who is it?” They replied, “It’s the CAC. Come on out and join us for some fun. And don’t forget your car keys.” I thought, “Not that land shark again.” I peeked out and saw some guy waving at me. I figured this was the real deal, and I opened the door. Well it wasn’t CAC. It was the Repo Man, and he grabbed my car keys, jumped into my car and drove off. I was mortified. I went back to the TV to watch Sgt. Schultz starring in Little House on the Stalag. Before the episode ended, there was another knock. “Who is it?” They replied, “It’s the CAC. Come on out and join us for some fun.” I opened the door only to find out it was the IRS, and they put a lien on my salary. I couldn’t take it anymore! I tore my shirt, knelt down on my knees and I cried, “Where did I go wrong!” Then a ray of light shone down on me from above. And a voice said, “You goofball! CAC doesn’t come knocking at your door to get you. You have to go to CAC to have fun. They send you a newsletter with all the great, fun activities every month.  Don’t fall for those bogus visitors claiming to be CAC. Just read your newsletter and come out to the events.” I replied, “Oh yeah. Thanks for the great advice. By the way, are you God?”  He replied, “No, it’s me, Gary. I’m on your roof with a flashlight.”  I went back in the house and sat down to watch Mr. Rogers starring in Rawhide. But soon there came a knock at the door. “Who is it this time?” They replied. “It’s the mail man. I’m delivering your mail including your new CAC Newsletter.” I thought, “Oh boy. I’ll finally get to have fun.” I eagerly opened the door. But it wasn’t the mailman. It was that land shark again. And he ate me.

But don’t fret. Remember--it was all just a dream. I’m OK. But there is a lesson here. CAC does not come to you. You have to go to CAC to have fun. If you wait for them to come to you, all you’ll get are land sharks, repo men, and IRS agents. Get off your duff and come out and join us for fun. I will be there too…right after today’s feature movie: Godzilla meets Gomer.


Mike Kernan

CAC President